Dear Dr Hedda, How Do I Find Love?

Posted on Jul 26 2013 - 3:58pm by Dr Hedda Mae

Dear Dr Hedda:

I’m in my late twenties and work at home. I do well and enjoy my work.

But you don’t meet any men in your at-home office. I’m lonely. So I decided to try some dating services. More expensive than I thougth but what choice did I have.

I signed up at two different services. Over that past year I have had about 20 dates. All first dates only, no phone calls, no flowers. I’ve been meeting the strangest men I ever met. They come right out and discuss their sexual likes and dislikes.. No smoke and mirrors here. I hoped we would discuss world views, future plans and hopes, look for areas of mutuality but no… they wanted to know how I felt about threesomes and group sex and how did I feel about leather. They were all so different than their profiles.

Well dating services don’t work for me. What do I try next?

Home Office

Dear Home Office

I’m confused too.You did read tier profiles an speak with them before you agreed to a meeting. One thing for sure, you sure can pick them.

You need to review your profile much more carefully. Look at the kind of men that are being attracted to you.

I suggest you make a list of the ten most important qualities that your man has to have. Make sure each item on the list is inflexable. For example – No financially dependent children or not paying alimony or needs to be a college graduate.

If you are asked out by a man that doesn’t meet your list say No. Don’t waste your time of the wrong men.

On the positive side you must be loveable, 20 men asked you out.

Dr. Hedda

About the Author

Dr Hedda Mae is a psychotherapist based in Oregon. She has been in private practice in both the clinical and private sectors and has spent many years as a national lecturer on subjects such as family dynamics, childhood and adult personality disorders and multicultural psychiatry. She can be reached at -

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