Dear Dr. Hedda, I Fail at Online Dating….

Posted on Oct 25 2013 - 2:10pm by Dr Hedda Mae

Dear Dr. Hedda:
Several of my single friends have met interesting and available men through different on-line dating services. So I thought I would give it a try.
I’ve had several “viewed your profile” hits but no one has responded and asked to meet me. I posted a very nice picture and tried to sound upbeat and interesting in my profile but nothing has happened. What am I doing wrong?

My friends are nice but I am definitely better looking and better educated.

Why aren’t men interested.
Alone and don’t know why.


Dear Don’t know why:
I don’t know either. I would have to actually see and read your  profile but I can make a few
guesses. First, you probably need to redo your profile. Let your friends read it and see if they think it’s a good description of you. Look for red flag items. Things that start with “I always” or I never” they are turnoffs. Makes you come across as inflexible.
Then try anew with a service or two you didn’t use before. 
But before you do any of that, take a moment and review what you want from these dating services. What kind of man are you looking for. Prince William is taken so be realistic in what you want in a man and a relationship. I suggest you make a list of the qualities that your next love must, inflexible, have. For example – college graduate or no pets. Then make a second list, call it the nice if he was…. for example, royalty, wealthy, a great tennis player.
Change your picture. Make sure it’s a flattering head shot. Show it to your friends to check out. Sometimes our favorite pictures are not really our “Best” pictures.
If this doesn’t get your some terrific hits then I don’t know why either.
Dr. Hedda

About the Author

Dr Hedda Mae is a psychotherapist based in Oregon. She has been in private practice in both the clinical and private sectors and has spent many years as a national lecturer on subjects such as family dynamics, childhood and adult personality disorders and multicultural psychiatry. She can be reached at -

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